Archive | Mindfulness

Rough Day at the Office?

By Elizabeth Galanti in Mindfulness, Stress Management, Work Issues

July 2014

Work stress has sky-rocketed but WHY?

Many reports indicate that the majority of companies aren’t replacing workers when they leave a job. Therefore, workloads have increased across the board without more pay. Monster reports that the top stressors are poor relations with the boss, low pay, long commutes and poor work-life balance.

There’s a condition that the Atlantic has dubbed “hyper-employment”. Thanks to laptops and smart phones, we have the ability to be connected 24/7 which wipes us out physically and emotionally.

WORK-STRESS TIPS:

Get enough sleep since lack of sleep can leave you vulnerable to even more stress. When you’re well-rested, it’s much easier to keep your emotional balance, a key factor in coping with job and workplace stress.
Turn off work when you walk through the door at home. This will allow you to practice compartmentalizing work stress and focus on recharging your own batteries through improved family relationships.
Acknowledge your state of mind by sharing your experience of work-related stress with your spouse or friend. And if your spouse shares that they are stressed at work, try and listen with an open heart.
Reduce alcohol intake since alcohol temporarily reduces anxiety and worry, but too much can increase anxiety as it wears off. Similarly, smoking when you’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed may seem calming, but nicotine is a powerful stimulant – leading to higher, not lower, levels of anxiety.

Take a small step today.

Anxiety — Fear — Worry. Oh My!

By Elizabeth Galanti in Anxiety, Mindfulness, Self-Esteem, Stress Management

March 2014

The distinction between “anxiety”, “fear” and “worry” is minimal and often indistinguishable. Whatever your emotional vocabulary, these feelings are uncomfortable, sometimes debilitating and not easy to avoid once they move in.

Unhappiness and discomfort in life is typically fueled by a few emotions; including anxiety, fear, and worry. They may feel like guests who showed up at your door and don’t want to leave. When tragedy or hardship hits, they might tighten their grip, setting up home in your head and heart.

These emotions can wash over you like a tidal wave or be an undercurrent of your daily life. Unrelenting doubts and fears can interfere with good quality of life while sapping your emotional energy.

Sara, a client from years ago, said to me, “I fear failure. I worry about being rejected. And, I certainly avoid making any mistakes. That’s just who I am and I’ve always been with way.”. Sara had difficulty sleeping through the night, was snapping at her husband/children and was eating more due to stress. She sought help from me to experience more joy in daily life, worry less and sleep better

In one of the early sessions with Sara – she asked if we could use scripture verses in our work because they gave her peace, comfort and security — and tied into her identity as a Christian. Together, we chose this verse:
“The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me?” (Psalm 118:6/ESV)

Sara began to shift into a new reality that she could live life without fear and anxiety in the forefront. She was able to relax her anxious parts and address those fears with a calm and heart-felt interest. Sara began to get to know these uninvited guests with patience and curiosity. As her understanding and compassion for those emotions increased – their grip decreased – and she welcomed them with open arms.

Only when we heal the anxiety/fear and stop trying to make it go away – can we begin to live more fully in the present moment and move into the future with courage, clarity and hope.

Peace be with you.

The Gift of Mindfulness

By Elizabeth Galanti in Mindfulness

December 2013

Do you feel that you live in a busy world with too much to do? In the rush to accomplish lots of tasks, you may find yourself losing connection with the present moment—missing out on what you’re doing and how you’re feeling.

Did you notice whether you felt well-rested this morning? Did you notice the different color hues in the sky as you drove into work this week? Do you ever notice that you sometimes eat when you are not actually hungry?

Mindfulness is the practice of purposely focusing your attention on the present moment—and accepting it without judgment.

Practicing mindfulness improves emotional well-being and mental health. It contributes to satisfied relationships, helps you savor the pleasures of life as they occur and equips you for adverse events.

By focusing on the here and now, people who practice mindfulness find that they are less likely to get caught up in worries about the future or regrets over the past and are less preoccupied with concerns about success and self-esteem.

Mindfulness improves physical health by relieving stress, lowering blood pressure, alleviating gastrointestinal problems, reducing chronic pain and improving sleep.

Mindfulness helps you to be more accepting of those around you, albeit family, friends or co-workers. A regular practice of mindfulness deepens your connection and compassion for those you love.

The best thing about mindfulness – it costs you next to nothing and has no negative side affects. It means merely seeking out the opportunity to weave it into your daily life.

I bid you peace.

Soothing the Sizzle of Anger

By Elizabeth Galanti in Anger, Mindfulness, Relationships

August 2013

I know about anger. For a number of years, I provided counseling to men and women who had encountered some type of serious problems due to their anger. Those problems were usually evident in their home, at work and/or in relationships.

I helped people understand that there are 4 styles of communication:

(1) Aggressive: You let hurtful, angry things fly out of your mouth that send the signal to the other person – “ You don’t count.”

(2) Passive: You stuff your feelings down that sends a signal to yourself – “I don’t count.” Over time, you may experience a lot of pain as you keep your emotions bottled up.

(3) Passive-Aggressive: Outwardly attempting to please people while rebelling against them in subtle ways that leave them frustrated and confused.

(4) Assertive: You speak FOR your anger (instead of FROM your anger) which sends the message, “You and I both count” so the other person feels valued while you express your feelings and bring up tender topics.

EXERCISE: Think of a time in the recent past where you were angry, agitated, irritated, resentful, blaming, defensive or sarcastic — even if you didn’t show it on the outside. Envision that moment and allow yourself to feel the same emotions as when it was happening and recalling the words that you said silently to yourself or aloud to another person.

As you re-experience it right now — notice where you feel that anger/irritation in your body.

Experience the discomfort — allow yourself to feel the anger without judging it — don’t try to change it. Just be with it.

Notice the words/phrases that you’re hearing inside of you (he was jerk –she was bossy – he acts like a know-it-all – she disrespected me – he’s a big mouth– she makes me feel like a nobody — they didn’t include me — etc.).

Now, take a few moments to calm yourself right now — being conscious to use self-soothing, calming words (“It’s ok – I’m ok – That other person is not here right now – I’m safe – I can relax right now – I’m not in that situation right now.”).

See what emotion is being covered up and protected by the anger…. perhaps it is sadness – loneliness – fear – hurt – worry – shame – abandonment – worthlessness – feeling unloved?

Once you begin to gain a deeper understanding of what’s underneath your anger – you can respond to people around you in a way that demonstrates you care for them and you care for yourself.

You can live your life with respect for your anger — and the wisdom that it holds.

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