Late Spring 2020
The pandemic has created the perfect storm to escalate fear, worry and anxiety. We are dealing with uncertainty, social isolation, health fears and economic challenges. These challenges are hitting us and our loved ones all at once. It’s as if someone flipped a light switch.
And, people don’t know when things will go back to normal. That creates new layers of anxiety.
In the midst of the storm – this is a great time to build resilience.
1. Awareness: What is in the Present vs the Past?
Really slow it down and check your emotional temperature to pinpoint your fear/concerns (instead of just saying, “I’m anxious”). What are your concerns exactly?
- job loss
- loneliness
- health worries
- concern for loved ones
- missing someone
- financial insecurity
- scared of the unknown
Ask yourself: How much of my distress is brand new with the pandemic and how much of it has always been there?
It is likely that some of your distress is specific to the pandemic and not anything you’ve ever been concerned about before.
And, it is also highly likely that some of your distress has traveled with you for a long time and you’ve never dealt with that fear/concern in a permanent way. You might have ways of covering it up or pushing it down. Yet, it comes back. This pandemic can ignite old issues like wildfire.
Here are some examples of how past issues can fuel current fears:
- An individual who grew up in a home where success/performance was highly valued might have built their identity around “doing well, working hard and being successful”. This person likely has pushed down fear of failure for a long time. In this time of economic uncertainty, their anxiety related to the threat of job/income loss will be more amplified than a person whose identity is not built upon performance.
- A person might have been exposed to illness as a youngster or a scary medical event or the death of a loved one. If that scary event was not properly talked about or explained to the child — this person might struggle with larger fears of death or illness during the pandemic.
- An individual who took on a caretaking role as a child might be feeling exceptionally overwhelmed during the pandemic because their children/spouse are now home 24/7 and they feel more pressure to caretake. Caretakers can be so focused on the needs of others that their unmet needs get pushed down even further, resulting in heightened despair and anxiety.
2. Build Resilience: Create a Gratitude Journal
There are many tools to increase resilience. One of my favorites is easy, simple and can be done individually and as a family.A Gratitude Journal entails jotting down things for which you are grateful. Your list might be short or detailed — it might contain small and large things. Make the list — and you will be left with a wonderful collection of inspiring material when you need a lift.Ask your partner and children to join in. Begin your evening meal by each person sharing one item of gratitude — no matter how small.
Benefits of a Gratitude Journal
1. Less stress. By highlighting gratitude, you increase feelings of well-being and contentment.
2. Better sleep. By reminding yourself of what you have to be thankful for, you are much less likely to ponder over your worries and more likely to de-clutter your mind for a good night’s sleep.
3. More optimism. When you choose to see more of the positivity in your life — you reduce the power of negative emotions. While these positive aspects of your life may be floating around in your subconscious, writing them down makes them more concrete and more real.
Enlighten what’s dark in me
Strengthen what’s weak in me
Mend what’s broken in me
Bind what’s bruised in me
Heal what’s sick in me
and lastly
Revive whatever peace and love has died in me